'Charge It': Keeping Up With Harry Read online

  "CHARGE IT"

  I

  IN WHICH HARRY SWIFTLY PASSES FROM ONE STAGE OF HIS CAREER TO ANOTHER

  "Harry and I were waiting for his motor-car," said the HonorableSocrates Potter. "He couldn't stand and wait--that would belosing time--so we kept busy. Went into the stores and boughtthings--violets, candy, golf-balls, tennis-shoes, new gloves, andneckties. Harry didn't need 'em, but he couldn't waste any timeand--

  "'There's the car!'

  "In each store Harry had used the magic words, 'Charge it,' and passedon.

  "We were going over to Chesterville to settle with the contractor whohad built his father's house. We had an hour and four minutes in whichto do it all, and then--the 6.03 express for New York. Harry had toget it to be in time for a bridge party.

  "We climbed in. Harry grabbed the wheel. The gas-lever purred, thegears clicked, the car jumped into motion and rushed, screeching, upthe hill ahead of us, shot between a trolley-car and a wagon, swungaround a noisy runabout, scared a team into the siding, and spedaway.

  "The town behind us! Country-houses on either side! A bulldog in thenear perspective! He set himself, made a rush at us, as if trying tograb a wheel off the car, and the wheel got him. We flushed a lot ofchickens. The air seemed to be full of them. Harry waved an apology tothe farmer, as if to say:

  "'Never mind, sir, I'm in a hurry now. Take my number and chargeit.'

  "'He struck a fowl, and, turning, I saw a whirl of feathers in the airbehind us and the farmer's fist waving above the dust.

  "Harry would have paid for the dog and the fowl in money but not intime--not even in a second of time! Harry had an engagement for abridge party and must catch the 6.03 express.

  "A man on a bicycle followed by a big greyhound was just ahead. Wescreeched. The man went into the ditch and took a header. Thegreyhound didn't have time to turn out then. He bent to the oars untilhe had gained lead enough to save himself with a sidelong jump intothe buttercups.

  "'Charge it!'

  "The needle on the speedometer wavered from fifty to fifty-five, thenstruck at sixty, held a second there, and passed it. Gnats and flieshit my face and stung like flying shot. The top of the road went up ina swirl of dust behind us. I hung on, with my life in my tremblinghands. We zipped past teams and motor-cars.

  "We filled every eye with dust and every ear with screeches and everyheart with a swift pang of terror.

  "'Charge it!'

  "A rider with a frightened horse raced on ahead of us to the nextcorner. We sped across the track into Chesterville and--

  "'Hold up! There's the office ahead.'

  "The levers move, down goes the brake, and we're there.

  "'Eleven miles in fourteen minutes!' Harry exclaims, as I spring outand hurry to the door. It was really sixteen minutes, but I alwaysallow Harry a slight discount.

  "'Not in!' I shout, in a second.

  "'Not in--heart of Allah!--where is he?'

  "'At the Wilton job on the point.'

  "'We'll go get him.'

  "'You go; I'll wait here.'

  "Away he rushes--I thank God for the brief respite. This high powerencourages great familiarity with the higher powers. But the Creator'sname is used here in no light or profane spirit, let me say. In eachcase it is only a brief prayer or, rather, the beginning of a prayerwhich one has not time to finish. It is cut short by a new adventure.

  "I say to myself that I shall not ride back with Harry. No, life isstill dear to me. I will take the trolley. And yet--what thrilling,Jove-like, superhuman deviltry it was! I light a cigar and sit down.Harry and Wilton arrive. Fifteen minutes gone!

  "I get down to business.

  "Harry says: 'Please cut it short.'

  "I could have saved five hundred dollars if I had had time to presentour side of the case with proper deliberation. But Harry keepsshouting:

  "'Do cut it short. I _must_ get there--don't you know?'

  "Wilton must have his pay, too--he needs every cent of it to-morrow.

  "'You go on. I'll stay here and settle this matter and go home by thetrolley.'

  "'Let's stick together,' my young friend entreats. 'Please hurry itthrough and come on with me. I need you.'

  "Harry must have company. His time is wasted unless he has aspectator--an audience--a witness--a historian. Without that, all hishair-breadth escapes would be thrown away. His stories would hang by athread.

  "'We've only twenty-one minutes,' he calls.

  "I say to myself: 'Damn the man whose money is like water and whosetime is more precious than the last hour of Mahomet.' Well, of course,there was plenty of money, but the supply of time was limited. Towaste a second was to lose an opportunity for self-indulgence.

  "I draw a check and take a hurried receipt and jump in.

  "Away we go. 'Look out!'

  "The brakes grind, and we rise in the air a little as a small boycrosses our bows. We just missed him--thank God!

  "'Don't be reckless, old man--go a bit slower.'

  "'It's all right. We've a clear road now.'

  "What a wind in our faces! There's the track ahead.

  "'_Look out! The train! God Almighty!_'

  "I spoke too late. We were almost up to the rails when I saw it. Wecouldn't stop. Cleared the track in time. Felt the wind of the enginein my back hair, and then my scalp moved. Just ahead was a light buggyin the middle of the road and a bull, frightened by the cars,galloping beside it.

  "In the excitement Harry hadn't time to blow, and the roar of thetrain had covered our noise. The bull turned into the ditch andspeeded up. We swerved between bull and buggy and grazed the side ofthe latter.

  "I jumped and landed on the bull, and that saved me. It's the firsttime that I ever knocked a bull down. He got to his feet swiftlybeside me, bellowed, and took the fence. He was a fat, well-fed bullwith a big, round, soft side on him. I never knew that a bull was somellow. My feet sank deep, and he gave way, and I hit him again withanother part of my person. I didn't mean it, and felt for him,although it is likely that his feelings needed no further help fromme. Of course I bounded off him at last and the earth hit me a hardupper-cut, but the bull had been a highly successful shock absorber.In a second or so I was able to get up and look around. The buggy hadgone over, and the horse was on his hind legs trying to climb out ofthe dust-cloud.

  "Harry stopped his car and began to back up.

  "'That'll do for me,' I said. 'I don't sit in your padded cell anylonger.'

  "I had lived a whole three-volume novel in the last forty minutes. ThePanama Canal had been finished and England had become a republic. Itwas too much.

  "We found two men--one at the head of the frightened horse, the otherlying beside the wrecked buggy with a broken leg.

  "And Harry had an engagement to play bridge!

  "I took the horse's head. The well man pulled a stake off the fenceand chased Harry around the motor-car. He didn't intend to 'chargeit.' Wanted cash down. I got hold of his arm and succeeded in calminghim.

  "Harry apologized and assured them that he was willing to pay thedamage. We picked up the injured man and took him to his home. On theway Harry explained that they should keep track of all expenses and:

  "'Charge it.'

  "In a few minutes Harry roared off in the direction of Pointview toget a doctor and the 6.03 express.

  "'It might be a little late,' he said, as he left us.

  "The next day Harry was arrested as a public enemy for criminalcarelessness. He had injured three men on the highways of Connecticut,to say nothing of dogs and poultry. Almost everybody had somethingcharged against Harry. He was highly unpopular, but a good fellow atheart.

  "I got the judge to release him on his promise to abandon motoring forthree years.

  "Thus he rushed out of the motor-car stage of his career into that ofthe drag and tandem.

  "He had had more narrow escapes and suffered greater perils than RobRoy.

  "Yes, bulls are a good thing--a comparatively soft thing. I reco
mmendthem to every motorist who may have to look for a place to land. Don'tever throw yourself on the real estate of New England. It can hitharder than you can."